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Added: Ruven Salguero - Date: 25.06.2021 13:12 - Views: 48674 - Clicks: 8673

Posted: Rachel Gombos. Please note that this article contains content related to sexual trauma. At the same time, rediscovering enjoyable physical contact as a survivor of trauma is possible and empowering. It is is what set me on my journey of practicing sex-affirming therapy and sharing quality sex education. When kink and trauma intersect in the therapy room, a clinician bdsm friendly wonder where to begin and how to maintain safety as a priority. One can start by understanding what it means to be a sex-affirming therapist.

While research on the subject is limited, clinicians are well advised to remain present with clients when they disclose engaging in a practice of kink or other sexual self-exploration. Clinicians can bear witness to clients beginning to understand and accept the rollercoaster of healing, and will need to have familiarity with specifics of ethical kink culture.

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This culture includes consent, limits, clear communication, and fun, with a goal of creating space for empowerment. Despite assumptions and erroneous associations in mainstream culture between kink and pathology, no extant research confirms kink practices are harmful to those with a trauma history. Therefore, no basis exists for discouragement or pathologizing of kink practice Coppens et al.

In fact, there is no statistically ificant difference between kink practitioners and their non-kinky counterparts in terms of a history of traumatic experiences Coppens et al. This may lead clinicians to ask why, when considering that research shows us that kink practice is healthy and that there is no correlation between kink practice and trauma, we still find oppressive patterns in therapeutic practices. Barker et al. They caution that the concept of healing narratives may reinforce the misconception that all BDSM practitioners engage in kink practices to address their problems.

This concept reinforces marginalization of kink practitioners with a schema of bdsm friendly. As clinicians, we are likely to discuss with our clients the impact of media consumption on our perceptions of both ourselves and others. Mainstream references to BDSM that immediately come to mind probably include movies like 50 Shades of Gray or Secretaryor episodes of television shows bdsm friendly as Criminal Minds.

It is understandable, if we are exposed to and associate our thoughts about kink with these representations, that we would have a limited understanding of BDSM. Hence, it is no surprise that on a wider level, BDSM practices are frequently equated with pathology.

Widespread historical teachings around sexuality exist within a framework of shame and continue to influence us today. Differing points of view and beliefs can make thinking about sexuality, shame, and kink uncomfortable. Whether or not this is the case for you, I invite you to ask yourself two questions:. If we could assume both of these things, how would that change the way in which we relate to our own bodies and sexuality? The World Health Organization n. I would be remiss in not reminding us all that often, the consent practices surrounding kinky acts—not the acts themselves—are empowering.

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Still, some folks might use kink to take back their power and define their self-narrative. While not every trauma survivor will find kink to be an empowering or even appealing practice, I have been fortunate enough to hear the stories of clients who have rediscovered their voices when encouraged to embrace their desires.

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Per my first article in this series, creating the expectations of communication, boundary setting, and active consent are all essential to safe and healthy kink practices. These elements can help empower survivors to find their voices in trauma treatment. When clients practice articulating their needs and are met with respect and support, this can positively influence other areas of their lives. Therapists must be lifelong learners, bdsm friendly challenging their own beliefs as they face new experiences. Considering the two questions above a little further can evolve into an exploration of the impact of kink suppression and lack of affirmation in the therapy room.

If we agree that kink practices are healthy and positive, and evidence shows that psychotherapists can play an active role in oppression, how does this affect our clients?

Bdsm friendly

It is the responsibility of providers to ensure that they gain a clear understanding of the common practices of consent and negotiation surrounding kink. In the third and final article in this series, I will continue to explore the process of educating ourselves as practitioners and what it looks like to take steps toward becoming a sex-positive therapist. Buehler, S. What every mental health professional needs to know about sex. Springer Publishing Company. Chivers-Wilson K. Sexual assault and posttraumatic stress disorder: a review bdsm friendly the biological, psychological and sociological factors and treatments.

McGill journal of medicine: an international forum for the advancement of medical sciences by students9 2— Coppens, V. The Journal of Sex Research Ford, M. Professional Psychology: Research and Practice34 180— Harris, S. Family therapist comfort with and willingness to discuss client sexuality.

Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 34, Lawrence, A. Kolmes, K. Nagoski, Emily Come as you are: The surprising new science that will transform your sex life. Rice, E. The Affirmative Couch. Shrage, L. Philosophizing about sex. Broadview Press. World Health Organization. Sexual Health. Out On The Couch.

Bdsm friendly

Sex- and kink-affirming therapy When kink and trauma intersect in the therapy room, a clinician may wonder where to begin and how to maintain safety as a priority. What influences our beliefs around kink? Kink as a healthy sexual practice Widespread historical teachings around sexuality exist within a framework of shame and continue to influence us today. Whether or not this is the case for you, I invite you to ask yourself two questions: What if kink is healthy?

What if kink is a positive thing? Next steps for bdsm friendly therapists Therapists must be lifelong learners, consistently challenging their own beliefs as they face new experiences. References Buehler, S.

Bdsm friendly

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How to find a kink-aware or BDSM friendly counsellor